Every day, we see multiple trains pass through Puyallup. Bub is in LOVE. We count cars, we talk about freight, and we.cannot.get.enough. By we, I mean he, in case you can't hear me saying this aloud to know where the emphasis/sarcasm should go. But I do love that he is so excited about something and wants to learn more. He's paging through a stack of non-fiction kids train books right now, including the one with hand-drawn cross-sections of a dozen different trains.
Every day, we walk Bumper to the bus stop, which is probably a half mile or more, and along the way (through the trailer park), Bub demands to know the number of every trailer. This is even more tedious than the train schtick, but I continue to answer him happily because I want him to be interested in numbers. Yesterday, I used it as an exercise in subtraction, by asking Bumper what would be next (as we walk home, we walk on the odd side, and the numbers go down by two, such as 63 take away 2 is...?, 55 take away 2 is...?) but she got tired of that real quick. Oh well. Maybe next time/later.
I'm really struggling with being unemployed today/this week that has completely whizzed by. I don't have a network here, and I don't have regular daycare to spend time building a professional network/taking people to coffee/asking for informational interviews. Also, Bumper gets on the bus at 8:06a and gets off at 3:39p, so anything I accomplish in a day really needs to be between those times.I might go see about a co-op preschool for Bub, so I can have a few hours of solitude each week to devote to this searching/networking/etc.
So, hurdles. And right now, they seem like really, really big hurdles. I know in my head they are regular-sized hurdles, and yet, my feels get in the way and distort my vision. Please say a little prayer for me that my vision is clear and I feel empowered instead of deflated.
Finally, I don't know that I really want to continue on a legal path; I really liked being involved with "problem-solving courts" for the human story part of it, and I was good enough at the legal-ish work, but the WA bar part is also cause for anxiety in my life. I mean, do I know enough law to actually practice? Should I really let that stop me? I mean, Amy Poehler and Hugh Laurie would tell me that we have to do things before we 'feel ready' because nobody ever really 'feels ready.' But not feeling/being ready is a recipe for disaster re: taking a bar exam, and I'm not so excited about that.
I found a communications position that I think I'd really enjoy and be successful in, but I just saw that the posting was re-listed/re-opened, without an invitation to interview from the first listing. I'll call today to see if they got everything they need from me/if I should re-submit my application...Cue trombone music.
Time to go pick up Bumper from the bus stop and get some dinner in the kids before we go gorge on fried treats at the fair, so I'll leave it here and hopefully have something more fun/hopeful/positive to report on soon.
Thursday, September 24, 2015
Monday, September 14, 2015
Hiatus: Ended
Life in a Sardine Can, or: Why Gratitude Is The Thing
I want to start by telling you that this is a stream-of-consciousness blog, written and posted from the local library while my thrilling three year-old sings a song-story about a Richard Scarry book he's looking at. My thoughts are as developed as I can get them in this environment. You've been warned.
When getting ready to embark on this relocation adventure to the Sea-Tac area of WA from the wilds of suburban Chaska, MN (Soar, Hawks!), I was told I would accumulate a bunch of blog-fodder with all the adventures and complaints associated with living in a 25' RV with my husband, two lovely and human children, and two awesome but not-small doggies. Mostly, I'm just trying to survive the day and search for a job. But I feel called to do more than complain about flatulence in confined spaces and the utter lack of wardrobe space I am allotted. Those things are real, and somewhat amusing, and what I have learned to get me through my temper tantrums about those inconveniences are that they are TEMPORARY. INCONVENIENCES. And that is a big personal revelation for control-freaky me.
Specifically, the 'Migrant Crisis' (I'm not sure if this is the best title for it, but I've seen it repeated, so it seems to make sense to keep using the common term) is speaking to me, whispering every day: look at those magnificent little people that you're allowed to parent, in this safe, stable, environment, surrounded be convenience and ease and calm and natural beauty. These wonderful little people say ridiculous things, they push my buttons and boundaries constantly, and yet... if I think about the three year-old body washed ashore, how in the world can I be anything but grateful for all of these opportunities afforded me? My heart is both full and broken. I am both powerful and powerless.
Non-sequitur (get used to it): Being unemployed kinda saps some of my personal power. It gives me an undertone feeling of 'not enough,' that I have to shake off every time I see a job opening that looks like something I would qualify for/be interested in/like to do. But what a freaking luxury I have to be at all choosy. When I think about all the people fleeing their homes in search of security, safety, to have their most basic needs met, my inconvenience of not being picked for a job yet seems pretty small. Of course, I have to balance that idea that I am so freaking lucky and that a good job will come to me if I just keep at it against the reality that our savings are finite and we have a house to sell in MN...but again, pretty small potatoes.
So often in drug court (my previous job), we talked about the importance of practicing gratitude. I hope this blog will be just that - a written gratitude practice, for the world or maybe just for myself. And today, I am thankful for my family: my children, my husband, my parents and sisters - to say I miss them is such I giant understatement that, to use a popular term, I can't even, and to my husband's parents. I am a lucky cat to have so many wonderful people in my corner.
So, this is my initial post in what I hope will be a regular storytelling, an ongoing record of my family's adventures, struggles, and life here. I hope to figure out ways that we can make a difference in the lives of others as I continue to discern my calling in this new place.
I want to start by telling you that this is a stream-of-consciousness blog, written and posted from the local library while my thrilling three year-old sings a song-story about a Richard Scarry book he's looking at. My thoughts are as developed as I can get them in this environment. You've been warned.
When getting ready to embark on this relocation adventure to the Sea-Tac area of WA from the wilds of suburban Chaska, MN (Soar, Hawks!), I was told I would accumulate a bunch of blog-fodder with all the adventures and complaints associated with living in a 25' RV with my husband, two lovely and human children, and two awesome but not-small doggies. Mostly, I'm just trying to survive the day and search for a job. But I feel called to do more than complain about flatulence in confined spaces and the utter lack of wardrobe space I am allotted. Those things are real, and somewhat amusing, and what I have learned to get me through my temper tantrums about those inconveniences are that they are TEMPORARY. INCONVENIENCES. And that is a big personal revelation for control-freaky me.
Specifically, the 'Migrant Crisis' (I'm not sure if this is the best title for it, but I've seen it repeated, so it seems to make sense to keep using the common term) is speaking to me, whispering every day: look at those magnificent little people that you're allowed to parent, in this safe, stable, environment, surrounded be convenience and ease and calm and natural beauty. These wonderful little people say ridiculous things, they push my buttons and boundaries constantly, and yet... if I think about the three year-old body washed ashore, how in the world can I be anything but grateful for all of these opportunities afforded me? My heart is both full and broken. I am both powerful and powerless.
Non-sequitur (get used to it): Being unemployed kinda saps some of my personal power. It gives me an undertone feeling of 'not enough,' that I have to shake off every time I see a job opening that looks like something I would qualify for/be interested in/like to do. But what a freaking luxury I have to be at all choosy. When I think about all the people fleeing their homes in search of security, safety, to have their most basic needs met, my inconvenience of not being picked for a job yet seems pretty small. Of course, I have to balance that idea that I am so freaking lucky and that a good job will come to me if I just keep at it against the reality that our savings are finite and we have a house to sell in MN...but again, pretty small potatoes.
So often in drug court (my previous job), we talked about the importance of practicing gratitude. I hope this blog will be just that - a written gratitude practice, for the world or maybe just for myself. And today, I am thankful for my family: my children, my husband, my parents and sisters - to say I miss them is such I giant understatement that, to use a popular term, I can't even, and to my husband's parents. I am a lucky cat to have so many wonderful people in my corner.
So, this is my initial post in what I hope will be a regular storytelling, an ongoing record of my family's adventures, struggles, and life here. I hope to figure out ways that we can make a difference in the lives of others as I continue to discern my calling in this new place.
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